12-12-12: What a Date!

From friends to schoolmate
Everyone's trying to make us rotate
Lots of fierce debate
What will be our fate?

Acting like a violent death-fearing inmate
From Kashmir to Kuwait
Do not get caught in a check-mate
There will be no hope if we cant think straight!

Let us all relax and equate
Ourselves without any hate
For a common cause, we shall donate
In unison, today lets celebrate!

Grrrr Grrr... Bangalore traffic

Bangalore was called the "Garden City" and "Pensioners' Paradise". Today it's no longer a garden city nor a paradise.

A couple of years back I had blogged about How to save petrol??? Increase traffic!!!. Today, it seems like someone has literally implemented my solution and saved petrol. But now I know I was WRONG! And so was the guy who implemented my proposal:-) Petrol was indeed saved... but who will save our lives!

The traffic in Bangalore is beyond redemption. There are choc-o-bloc traffic jams on every road. Nope... not a single road is spared. At any given time. Whats the reason behind all this traffic??? (Too much) People of course... Consider an analogy of your home. You and your family stay happily. Sometimes u have guests in your house... you treat them nicely... they stay for a couple of days... then they go back to their homes. All's well. What would you do if the guests stayed longer? You would definitely lose your cool ... right. A home can accommodate 5 people. You can adjust with 10 people. You can crib and stay with 15 people. But after that... you will ask them to go back to their houses. Fish and relatives stink after 3 days. That's normal human behavior. Why not apply the same behavior on the scale of cities?

My proposal: VISA FOR BANGALORE.

The way we apply for visas when travelling abroad, the way we don't stay abroad indefinitely without proper visas... the way you will be deported back to your country after visa expiration... in the same way... we need to have in place a process for obtaining visa if you want to come to Bangalore (or any city for that matter). Come visit Bangalore, do your job and go back to your home sweet home. (I am not against people who have already settled in Bangalore.) That way lots of problems can be addressed. This VISA thing is a genuine solution... there are technical & political challenges to implement it... but its well within our democratic values to execute such a solution... and in everyone's interests.

And Bangalore will become a Garden City once again!

Six word stories... I love it!!!

Me & pal had this conversation. Obviously regarding the "Six Word Stories".

12:46 PM me: what is wrong with u... huh???

my_pal: what?

me: thoo die

12:47 PM u didnt get it???

my_pal: ?

me: shameless

my six word story response to ur six word status message

my_pal: :|

12:48 PM me: u are shameless. u know that!!!

now do u get it???

my_pal: yes I do. forgive my ignorance.

12:49 PM u addicted to that site, right?

me: i am thinking what to reply

my_pal: good. take ur time. no rush.

12:50 PM me: good one man... thats fucking awesome

my_pal: ha ha ha! thank u again!

12:51 PM me: this is unfair usage of words

no repetition allowed ... play fair dude

12:52 PM my_pal: play fair? just accept you lost!

12:53 PM me: why should i accept defeat... poda

just an indian touch you see:)

12:54 PM my_pal: your choice of words is inspiring

me: i know. now even u know!!!

12:55 PM dont waste time in your office

my_pal: I'm only adding to your words

me: get back to doing ur work

i am jobless... are u too???

12:56 PM my_pal: is that a suggestion? well ... pass!

me: pass or fail... they will decide

u just have to accept it

12:57 PM my_pal: don't try to outsmart me ... bitch!

me: i am not trying to ... bitch

12:58 PM my_pal: hmmm. ok. this time you're spared.

12:59 PM me: finally accepted defeated right... fuck off:)

my_pal: a wiseman knows when to stop

me: and what about the dumb man???

1:00 PM my_pal: he keeps writing in six words ...

gotcha!

1:01 PM me: amazing reply... i bow my head

my_pal: you are spared bitch!

me: u are the chosen one. Hail!!!

1:02 PM is it 4 word sentences now???:)

my_pal: yes ... u can drop the six word thing now :P

back to normal please. this's difficult :P

me: its super cool man... why stop

my_pal: :D

me: slow and steady wins the race!!!

1:03 PM my_pal: slow and steady wins else's race

1:04 PM me: that doenst mean anything... my boy

1:06 PM my_pal: like most of what we said

1:07 PM me: thats true... me reiterating the fact

u are too slow man... forget

u are not upto my mark

1:08 PM never mind... improve ur skills ok???

and then lets decide... what say???

my_pal: yes sir. I give up. Pardon.

1:09 PM me: work maadi... enough of wasting time

my_pal: me off for lunch. see u!

me: bye.

Midway my inconsiderate pal gave up.

I hope u guys liked it.
Its so addictive u cant stop.
All sentences are six word stories:)
... in case you haven't noticed it!!!

Nothing

I had been out of blogging for a while. So sorry folks (i.e whoever still follows my blog). I have recently found a new aspiration to start blogging again. So let me start off my second innings of blogging with a blog about Nothing.

So u must be wondering "How the hell can anyone blog about Nothing???" Cos if u are blogging about Nothing, then u can't be blogging in the first place since if u are really blogging about Nothing then technically you wouldn't be blogging at all as Nothing simply cannot be blogged . Think about it... it does make sense.:) You tell me... how can anyone blog about Nothing. I cant u cant. Then how in God's name am i blogging about Nothing. Thats because Nothing is simple to achieve. (pat on my back from myself... that really was a good sentence) U can just about say anything what's in ur mind and people will say "Oh... thats Nothing".  I guess Nothing is omnipresent and omnipotent. To blog about Nothing, u would first concentrate on Nothing. Initially u will find it difficult. You will think that it's impossible to concentrate on Nothing. Infact u will feel it as a paradox. But after some concrete effort, u really can think about Nothing. Once u have some vague ideas in ur mind about Nothing, u can improvise your thoughts so that Nothing wouldn't remain as Nothing forever. It must be transitioned to Something:) 

Huh... I myself am getting confused of Nothing now. Do u see the pun here??? "Am I confused of nothing or am i confused of Nothing???." How did i write so much about Nothing??? Well what can i say... my fingers are just dancing and moonwalking over the keyboard. Some random letters are getting typed. Some stupid words are being written. Some weird sentences are being formed. Though I know that Nothing is being written, my fingers are not stopping themselves from dancing. Ok fingers, I am going to give you some more time. Enjoy your happy time and have a blast and do all the dancing you want. You can type whatever pristine-crap u want. You can dance around in which ever way u want. Thats all you could type. You are already thinking what next to type. What a shame. I thought you will go on and on and on. I never expected you to give up so soon. Time's up.

Why do we, the IT people, crib so much???

I have been pondering over this question for a long time but in vain.

We have the best looking steel-and-glass offices, best salaries, best comforts... the list goes on. A look at the IT offices is in itself a pleasure. Nice(sometimes weird) design, architectural wonders and innovative structures. From the inside, the story gets even better. Air conditioners, comfortable seats to sit on, lovely lightings around the cubicle, free snacks, free coffee and tea and boost:), clean drinking water, dust free environment, educated professionals around... the list goes on again. So, what do we crib about??? The single most definitive answer I have come across- "long working hours".

How to quantify "long"??? How long should "long" be to be called as "long"??? 10 hours, 12 hours, 14 hours... how much. The answer is subjective. Lets consider for the sake of argument that on an average 10 working hours per day is considered to be long. Name a profession and average out the working hours. Small shop owner: 9am to 9pm. Porter: 6am to 10pm. General physician: 10am to 8pm. Surgeon: 10am to 7pm (without considering the midnight calls in case of emergencies). A surgeon is also under immense pressure as lives are at stake. There is no room for error. What are the perks these guys get??? What are the average salaries of these people??? You work it out. How many of these people crib??? Every profession needs long working hours. A surgeon might receive extra perks and higher salaries but his profession demands that. He cannot commit even a single mistake. (unlike us who can just re-compile the code again and again and again!!!) They might crib about their plight; but why is it not coming up in the media??? Why are the news channels and paper media concerned about the IT people and not the other crowd??? Why do they focus only on us??? Why??? I dont have an answer. We have been spoilt with all the attention that we get.

Coming to number of days of work per week. We "officially" have to work 5 days a week. In other professions, the official number of days of work is 6 or 7 (or 5 for that matter). We can take holidays at will. We can make excuses at will. If we consider a daily-wage labourer, can he take holidays??? Yes he can, but he wont get paid for that day. If his family is dependent on him, u think about it; rain or pain he has to work to meet his daily needs. Is he not under pressure??? Infact he is under pressure than most of the professions. I dont even want to talk about his perks and working conditions. You know it better than I do.

So what differentiates our pressure with their pressure??? Many say that while theirs is physical, ours is mental pressure. Valid point should I say. Who is not under mental stress??? Infact our profession is mental stress alone while most other professions demand both. But, does it require so many perks and luxuries??? Does it justify us cribbing??? Can we even crib??? I. DONT. THINK. SO.

If I were a girl...

I wouldn't have had second thoughts of having an affair with Arjun Rampal.

Startup and Me

Well guys, you would have come across this question "Why should one join a startup???" I guess this question has been asked for quite sometime now. This question seems to be moving around quickly lately because the number of startups are exponentially increasing in India and particularly in Bangalore. There could be a lot of answers to this. Some of the most famous answers are "you will get to learn a lot in a short span of time", "your career growth will be faster", "everyone in the company will know u and u will know everyone and hence it will be a very friendly place to work", etc. Similarly there could be reasons for not joining a startup too.
A few common reasons given are "man, your startup might fail and u could become jobless", "dude, are u ready to work for 14-16 hours???", "there wont be any facilities for employees da... no free lunch, no free transportation", etc. Frankly, both sides of this argument are reasonable. It's up to the individual to decide whether to join a Startup and Slog or join an MNC and Marry.:)

I willingly joined a startup after my M. Tech through campus recruitment. I have already gone through both sides of the coin in 3 months. Some days, I have worked for 16 hours a day. Some days I have skipped dinner to complete my work. But I learnt a lot of interesting things. And I know everyone and everyone knows me:) I will share with you guys the one reason, apart from all the answers and reasons discussed (or not discussed) above, as to why I am very happy for having joined this particular startup. Here goes...

I joined in August 2008. The entire August was spent time-passing. Go to office, surf, have lunch, take a small powernap, surf, go for a tea break, surf, go home and sleep. Life was good. Then they told that you have to come to Chennai for training for 15 days. In Chennai I actually had a trailer of what a startup is. From day one (day four to be precise), I started slogging. Everyday my guide used to tell me to learn this and then do a sample project on what u have learnt. First of all, learning that thing was difficult. Second, I had to implement a sample project too. Those 15 days were quite hectic. Then they sent me back to Bangalore and life was good again. Before sending me, they told me that next time u will have to stay in Chennai for a month. "Ok no problemo" was my reaction as I was eager to get back to "home sweet home". Then came the moment of truth when I landed in Chennai for the one-month stay. I was put in their search module(on my request actually!!!) and they wanted me to implement Search v2.0 because one of them had already implemented Search v1.0 earlier. The difficulty was Search v2.0 had nothing in common with Search v1.0 at all. I had to start my module from scratch. Scratch as in scratch. I was the first person to put a semicolon in Search v2.0:) I feel honoured!!!. I had little time to complete the whole stuff as my company had plans to go for an alpha release. "Search v2.0 has to go into the alpha release" is what I was told. So I started slogging from day one. Slogging, slogging and more slogging. During my previous stay in Chennai, it was trailer. Now it was the whole movie and its sequel. That one-month was hectic. I worked on Saturdays and Sundays too. Everyday was a work day. Everyday I worked for 12 hours minimum. It was bad. Luckily, I was able to complete what was assigned. Now, coming back to that one reason why I am very happy is that my module is already integrated into the alpha release and my module is online on the internet and my module is being used by tens(if not hundreds or thousands) of people already. All of this happened in 30-40 days. 30-40 days!!! Scratch to internet. Can u believe it??? It feels damn good when I see my module on the internet and people using it and giving feedback (positive or otherwise). Its an incredible feeling. Seeing my module on the internet in just 30-40 days. Wow!!!

"I was at the right place at the right time" is all that I can say.